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UPDATED – Webb to Make Major Announcement Later Today

Posted on April 1, 2008 by Riley

Sen. Thinskin Gump (D-WashPo) is scheduled to make a major announcement later today.  Details are still sketchy, but we understand that during the Senate Democrat caucus meeting this morning that Webb had some sort of dust-up with Sen. Robert Byrd (D-W.Va.) and it may have something to do with that.

UPDATE:  I’ve just heard from a friend who works for the Capitol Police that officers were dispatched to the aforementioned meeting this morning.  More to come…

UPDATE 2:  An old classmate of mine from law school who is a Senate Democrat staffer e-mailed us a first-hand account of what went on –

Just saw your post on Webb and wanted to get this in ASAP to you.  I was in the meeting this morning with my boss and caught the end of it.  I’m not sure what started the argument between Webb and Byrd, but Webb got pretty hot under the collar and took a swing at Byrd.  Sen. Kerry was near Webb and managed to hold his arm back before he could actually hit Byrd.  Kerry held Webb back and then Byrd started to flail at Webb like he was going to go after Webb.  That’s when Sen. Levin stepped in and restrained Byrd.    Lautenberg called in the Capitol Police who were stationed outside the caucus room.  The whole thing was just so surreal!

UPDATE 3: Obviously, we don’t have any sort of “in” with Webb or any of his staff given our harsh treatment of him over the years, so we’re pretty much in news blackout on this announcement.  The only thing we can pass along is that we have heard from others on the Hill that some sort of statement will be issued from his office around 4 p.m. today.

Now is your chance to guess what it will be.  Will he be entering an Anger Management Clinic for treatment?  Committed to a psychiatric ward?  Changing parties again (Socialist Workers Party anyone)?  Resigning from the Senate now that he has held this job longer than any other he ever has and is bored?  Predict away!

UPDATE 4:  We’ve been sent the following photo that someone took with their camera phone.  Not much, but you can see Sen. Lautenberg motioning from the top of a chair for help in breaking up the melee.

UPDATE 5:  In a shocking turn of events, Webb’s announcement is unrelated to this morning’s scuffle.  In a statement issued by his senate office, Webb has acknowledged a previously undisclosed “love child” that he fathered.

Now we know the REAL story behind such songs as “Never Gonna Give You Up” and “Cry For Help.”

Filed under: Congress, Humor, Sen. Thinskin Gump (D-WashPo), Virginia Politics

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18 Responses

  1. Light Horse, on April 1st, 2008 at 10:16 am Said:

    He never does stay in one job for long. He gets mad at someone and leaves in a huff.

  2. Doug Mataconis, on April 1st, 2008 at 10:42 am Said:

    This is a joke, right ?

  3. Riley, on April 1st, 2008 at 10:47 am Said:

    I’ve heard bits and pieces of this from two sources. One is someone who used to be in YRs with me in Alexandria who joined the Capitol Police and the other is someone who I went to law school with and she has always been a straight shooter.

    I have no idea what Webb and Byrd would be arguing over. Maybe whose sheets are whiter?

  4. Bill, on April 1st, 2008 at 10:54 am Said:

    Anyone else looking at the calendar? ;)

  5. Turning over a new leaf? at Bearing Drift, on April 1st, 2008 at 10:58 am Said:

    [...] a dreadful bureaucratic and wasteful mistake at the Virginia Capitol and Jim Riley reports of a scuffle in Washington DC. Filed under Blogging [...]

  6. John, on April 1st, 2008 at 10:58 am Said:

    Oh Riley…

    If this is an April Fools joke, You may lose one of your regular readers.

    This is just too good to be true.

    :-P

  7. Riley, on April 1st, 2008 at 11:07 am Said:

    Bill, the announcement wouldn’t be on Webb’s online Senate calendar. They don’t update those for spur of the moment announcements like what they’re doing today.

  8. Bill, on April 1st, 2008 at 11:19 am Said:

    I know that. I was referring to the fact that today was April 1st. ;)

  9. Riley, on April 1st, 2008 at 11:24 am Said:

    And tomorrow is April 2nd while yesterday was March 31st. I take it you are referring to John’s question as to whether this is an “April Fool’s” post. To be honest, the post about the daily “Weird Al” celebrity interviews is our April Fool’s Day post.

  10. Anonymous, on April 1st, 2008 at 12:40 pm Said:

    Maybe he’ll resign!
    Could this have anything to do with Obama and the Prez election?

  11. Not Chris Wallace, on April 1st, 2008 at 12:48 pm Said:

    None of the other news sources are reporting this— you do have great sources–maybe you could come work for me on FNS

  12. John, on April 1st, 2008 at 2:02 pm Said:

    This is sad… I really was hoping it was true.

  13. Bill, on April 1st, 2008 at 2:20 pm Said:

    It’s almost unheard of for something like this to happen in Washington and not be reported by the journalists who walk the halls of the Capitol all day, particularly with 5 senators involved. Something like this not finding its way to any Washington news outlets by 2:19 pm makes it pretty safe to say it’s a hoax.

  14. John, on April 1st, 2008 at 2:42 pm Said:

    So sad… but so believable!

    Bravo Mr. Riley!

  15. J.R., on April 1st, 2008 at 3:20 pm Said:

    Jim,
    The fact that you know this music so well that you can make these kinds of jokes disturbs me.

  16. Riley, on April 1st, 2008 at 3:29 pm Said:

    Actually, that was a featured video on YouTube’s front page today.

  17. Anonymous, on April 1st, 2008 at 3:33 pm Said:

    It sounded a little suspicious that Kerry could hold back Webb…

  18. The Write Side of My Brain » I’m an April fool, on April 1st, 2008 at 8:35 pm Said:

    [...] Virginia Virtucon:  Webb to Make Major Announcement Later Today [...]

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